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Truth be told the American girl intimidates me.  I think of Nicki Minaj and her songs.

The American girl can literally “Kick your !!!”

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She is convince that she is your equal or even better in every way (and maybe she really is) .

(Remember this is delving into my own mind, my psyche…)

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Very likely I’m still the intimated child, who literal cried at his sixth grade dance because he was gripped with the fear that no girl wanted to dance with him…

My high school days didn’t prove much better…

With only the exception of one gorgeous girl, all the girls that I was interested in saw me as insignificant or as a great person to address when they wanted to copy my homework… (one of the “perks” of graduating near the top of my class…)

I asked a few girls out, but was always rejected.

I didn’t even go to Prom.  (Is it any wonder that I was glad to leave high school ?!?!)

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And then there was “the church”… during my post high school years, I was devoted to the church and to serving God.  (I had been in my school years too, but I’m focusing on my experience with women at the moment.)

Many times, I found myself attracted to one young lady or another.  And as a devoted follower of the faith, I rarely considered someone who was not all a Committed Christian…

Time and time again I heard, “God told me that you are not right for me.”  I can say most of those girl when on to have relationships and marry good Christian men, others…

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I can’t say that all my early life experiences with women were bad.  I had some good friends during my university years…

Then there was Amy, the girl who although was beautiful and could dance circles around me in a country bar, would always meet me with a big smile ever time I got up the courage to ask her to dance… as if she was waiting all night for me to do so…

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But overall the message was clear… no girl who I was interested in found what I had to offer appealing…

Mind you… it wasn’t that I myself thought that I had little to offer…

This is me when I played College football (during which time I was also a college sprinter and a trumpet player, who traveled to various states and participated in various exchange programs)

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And afterwards an officer, who could be called upon to make lifesaving decisions and then one of two national manager and instructor for a computer system used to track millions of dollars of service and parts.

I made in person proposals to Captains and even from time to time to Admirals.

So I had (as I still have) great confidence in myself and my capabilities.

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And yet the American Girl could with sincerity decide my inferiority…

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PARSING MY MIND – Part II (The Slavic (Russian/Ukrainian) Girl)

PARSING MY MIND – Part III (My Type Of Girl)

PARSING MY MIND – Part IV (Social Status)

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